Thanksgiving a Little Late

I haven't written anything in a while. I guess I haven't felt the inspiration to write.

I have been battling with dark thoughts lately. It just seems like everything is dark around me. This time of year is beautiful with the fall colors but the leaves are quickly dropping away and the stark limbs are a dreary reminder that winter is coming. And for those of you who didn't know, during the fall and winter in the Northeast, it gets dark here by 4:30~!!! It's almost too much darkness! And I'm finding it very depressing. It just adds to the feeling of being blue (or maybe it's even causing it!)

I have to keep reminding myself that so many factors could be causing the sadness I feel lately. It could be the lack of daylight and my hormones going crazy and who knows what else that is effecting my mood. It is such an effort to not wallow in these dark moods.

I saw this show recently where a blind woman was talking about how important it is to monitor our self talk. She says we are rarely aware of what we're saying to ourselves and that we should tune in. She said that most of us are playing some very destructive tapes in our heads. Most of the messages are negative and critical and were usually recorded when we were young. We just heard the words so much that they have become the norm to us and now it's the message we continue to listen to. It's like our minds have been programed to self destruct on their own!

And if you haven't read the book, Battlefield of the Mind by Joyce Meyer, I would recommend it heartily! In it, she describes how most of our problems originate in the mind. That's where the battle is fought and won (or lost).

Well, there is a battle raging in my head right now, that's for sure. I can almost feel my thoughts getting their "heads" blown off as I struggle to write this blog.


I have to take hold of my thoughts and command them to go in a different direction. I have to give them new orders because I can't just let them do what they want. Otherwise I'm going to lose this battle!

I think my thoughts will need to be reprogrammed. I need to feed my thoughts with positive seeds so good thoughts will be produced. I need to pull these negative, gloomy thoughts out of my mind by the root! And I need to focus on the good things in my life and be thankful instead of focusing on what I don't have. Of course it sounds good on paper but can I make it happen?

"Being thankful is what you do, when you're feeling a little blue."


OK then, let me try to be thankful even though it's about the last thing I want to do right now.

(Ten minute break)
I took a break and wrote down the things I am thankful for and it was a nice exercise. What surprised me about it was the order in which I randomly wrote things down. I started with my health which is certainly important but then I realized I wrote my faith down on number 7 and my family after that! The ones before were other physical things I was thankful for and I even put my job at number 6 and I don't really like my job that much! I am thankful to have it because it brings in a little extra cash but i don't enjoy the job of being a substitute teacher!

That made me realize that I'm often not aware of what I'm really thankful for. I kind of haphazardly go my way each day oblivious to the blessings that surround me. It made me want to make more of an effort to be aware of, and to be thankful for, my many blessings~~~

These are just some of the thoughts that went through my head today after doing this very painless exercise. It was easy and it made me think about my life and what's good about it --which is always a positive step!

So I just wanted to encourage you to do a "Thankful List" too even though Thanksgiving is over. It might give you a better perspective on your life.
You could ask yourself things like:

Do you think about your blessings each day?

If you do, how do you show your appreciation?

Do you thank God for these blessings?

Or do you just attribute them to luck?

What are you most grateful for?

How can you live a more contented, grateful life?

I am going to try and be thankful for the rest of this day. I'm not going to look at the dark things for now. I'm going to try and focus on what I consider blessings.

And I don't think it would hurt any of us to make Thanksgiving a way of life and not just something we celebrate once a year.

"To be thankful is to be truly alive!"

I'm feeling better already! Thanks for listening :)

Comments: carolrtexas2@aol.com

PS
By the way, I'm very thankful for each of you!

My Last Neatly Packaged Blog

Someone responded to my last blog "Got Peace?" and said he could relate to the beginning of the blog but not to the end of it. He understood how it is trying to find a rare, peaceful minute in this life but he could not relate to the end of my blog. That's the one where I neatly packaged my story with the "get Jesus and you'll get peace" ribbon.

He is a Christian but he said he wished it were that simple to find peace. I do too!

I felt like I had succumbed to a weakness I have always had which is to wrap everything up in my mind with a tidy, nice ending. I like happy endings and I always want my stories and musings to have one but I think I made the bow too big on this one.

Life is simply not that simple and I, of all people, know that. That is why I have repressed so many bad memories because they don't fit into my happy ending ideology. So forgive me for the trite ending of my last blog. It was not fitting. It was not honest.

I do believe what I said is true but not how I presented it. If you truly abide in Jesus you will have peace. But I am no expert in the peace department and I shouldn't have come across as one.

So if you don't have peace in your life, I empathize , because I don't very often either. I think it's hard to live under the "shadow of the Almighty" all the time in this fallen world. I believe Jesus did it but He's probably the only ONE Who really succeeded at it.

For the rest of us, it's a hit and miss endeavor. Sometimes we live in that reality and sometimes we don't. When we do, it's glorious because nothing can touch us there. But more often than not, the world gropes at us with its worries and troubles and we usually let it snatch our peace away. And I think that's where the majority of us live most of the time.

So, to end this blog, I will do it more honestly this time. I wish I had more peace in my life. I long for it, crave it and need it. And the older I get, the more I desire it. I do believe very much in Heaven and that I will find peace there that is unimaginable. But in the meantime, I'd like to find more of it down here.

Any suggestions or comments, write carol at: carolrtexas2@aol.com
She'd love to hear from you! Honestly!

Got Peace?

It's Sunday and we just got home from church. We have to leave in a few hours to go to a party in New Jersey for a friend of the family. So I'm thinking that I would like to take a little nap before we go.

I am just about to nod off when the phone rings. Then, as if on cue my dog ,Sugar, barks because she sees a squirrel outside. So with great urgency, she jumps on me from the top of the couch where she had been looking out the window. She runs to the back of the house to see if the squirrel is in the backyard where she would just love to catch it and mangle it. And much to Sugar's delight, my son had just gone out and left the door open!! So she got to run outside and actually chase the squirrel (something she usually only imagines). Tim saw the whole thing transpire so he knew that he was the lucky one who would have to run after her (the dog-not the squirrel). While he was gone the gutter guy showed up--on a Sunday! And after the phone rang a few more times (Luke's friends call every 3 minutes unless you pick up the phone to tell them he's not there), I decided to give up the notion of a nap~~~~

Peace. An elusive state of being.

Sometimes I find it and then it's gone. It's like a gentle dove. Doves will fly away at the slightest noise or disturbance. Peace is like that--gone at the slightest provocation.

A few mornings ago, I decided to take a walk. I love this time of year with the leaves changing color and the crisp, cool air. I just wanted to take it all in so I set out to get some exercise while enjoying the season. About the exact same time, a man nearby decided this would be a good time to turn on his leaf blower (Who invented these? And what purpose do they really serve other than to move leaves around and annoy neighbors?) This also happened to be the time of morning when the garbage trucks started their job. And the dog across the street had to start barking and prompted several other dogs to do the same thing. And of course, a morning would not be complete without a few sirens going down the street or a car alarm going off!

Once again, peace eluded me.

But what if I had found the peace I sought this particular morning? How long would it have lasted?

One of my cousins just moved with her husband to a town in Oklahoma so they could be close to their son and his children. They had everything now. A nice house close to their family and life was good. Six months later, she died. How long did her peaceful existence last? Not long.

My conclusion: peace is not included in the gift of life! If you happen to find it, you won't keep it long. If one moment has it, the next one won't! If this war ends, another one will soon follow. If everything is going great, it won't last.

I sound like a pessimist but I am also speaking a truth that no one likes to hear. This world offers no permanent peace. No matter how hard we try to arrange life to our liking, it won't stay the way we want it.

"They will seek peace, but there will be none."

So it would seem that we must seek peace someplace other than here because obviously, we're not going to find it on this planet.
Is there any place that does have it?
Does anyone have the answer?
Do we have to die to find peace?

"Yes,... yes ....and.... no."

There is a place that has it and there is Someone Who knows the Answer and we don't have to wait until we die to find it!

Well, this is good news-- finally!

So where is this place that has lasting peace?
Right here, right now, on this earth!

I thought you said there is no peace on this earth?
There isn't-- if you don't know the Man. It's not the place that is important--it's the Person.

And WHO is this Person Who has the Answer?
Jesus, the Son of God. HE can give us peace in this troublesome world.

"These things I have spoken to you, that in ME you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation; but be of good cheer. I have overcome the world."
John 16:33

"Peace I leave with you, MY peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid." John 14:27

Any thoughts or comments? Email Carol at: carolrtexas2@aol.com