There is a tree on the campus of Abilene Christian University in Texas that is very special to me. I sat under it many times contemplating life . It was under this tree that I first began to realize the power of prayer.
When I first started college at ACU, I had one friend there. She was my best friend in High School and we lived next door to each other in the dorm. But soon after we started college she started dating a boy and spent a lot of time with him.
That meant I was now ALONE!
I had one of the lowest self esteems (not sure you can pluralize that word?) imaginable!~ I was always very shy but being in a college with all new people was overwhelming to me. My Mother worked at the college and, even though I loved to see her beautiful face every day, I did not want her to know how lonely I was. For that reason I often refrained from going to see her after chapel. I knew she would wonder why I wasn't hanging out in the student center with everyone else. So, instead, I would go to my tree-- and cry.
My tree was next to the theater on campus. It was large for a West Texas tree and gave me a covering to hide my shame of loneliness. I would sit there until it was time for my next class and, by then, all the kids who were socializing and mingling at the student center had left for their classes as well.
But finally one day, I decided that instead of feeling sorry for myself, I would ask God to bless me with some friends. I didn't have a clue how to get one. My best friend in high school had befriended me when we were in grade school and there weren't many others knocking down my door to be friends with me. They probably thought I was a snob since I would mostly ignore people-- not knowing how to appropriately talk to anyone.
So there I sat for months--alone, praying, and really hoping that God could give me some friends. And before my freshman year was over, HE did! God answered my prayers . It did not come easy, but I believe HE gave me the strength to go out and start talking to people. He gave me favor and He gave me some of the best friends I could ever want. I am still friends with many of them today!
God has blessed me with many good friends over the years. Each one I consider a precious gift to me, because I believe God is still answering those prayers offered up many years ago under a tree in Texas!
to email Carol regarding this post : carolrtexas2@aol.com
Friday, September 28, 2007
Transparency
Scary word--TRANSPARENCY. To be transparent with someone is to let them see you on the inside. Very scary!
There are few people in the world I can be totally transparent with. I know you realize when you do open yourself up and let someone look inside, you give them a certain power over you. You are now vulnerable to them. You're saying to that person: I'm giving you a peak into my soul but-- please don't hurt me.
I have chosen only a few people to let inside. They are my treasured friends. I trust them with my heart because I know they will handle it with care.
How many people have you been transparent with? Have they handled your heart well? If not, did you close up, seal the door to your heart and now have a vow of silence? No one comes in and no one goes out. All your pain is stuffed deeply inside, aching to get out. I don't want you to live that way. Life is too short to carry such a load. You have to let someone help you bear the burden you carry or soon you will be crushed by it.
I believe God gave us each other so we could help each other in this life. God knows we need help. This life is too hard and we can't do it by ourselves.
It is in relationship that we can share each other's pain and joy. HE made us to need companionship. So, if we don't have it, we suffer because we NEED to be known!
One of my most favorite books, Waking the Dead, by John Eldredge talks about our need for companions on this journey called life. It's a dreadful journey to go alone. We won't make it. We need someone to offer a hand when we fall, arms to hold us when we can't go any further, and a shoulder to cry on when our heart is breaking.
So I hope all of you reading this have someone you can pour out your heart to and if you don't, I hope you will find someone very soon. By the way, I have a very soft shoulder.........
But I believe the most important relationship we can have is with our Creator. HE made us for relationship and the primary one should be with HIM! HE truly wants us to tell HIM what is going on in our heart. So tell HIM. And if you need a relationship, start with HIM!
I'm going to tell you my Tree story next. It's all about Relationships!
Carol
To respond to this post you can email Carol at:
carolrtexas2@aol.com
There are few people in the world I can be totally transparent with. I know you realize when you do open yourself up and let someone look inside, you give them a certain power over you. You are now vulnerable to them. You're saying to that person: I'm giving you a peak into my soul but-- please don't hurt me.
I have chosen only a few people to let inside. They are my treasured friends. I trust them with my heart because I know they will handle it with care.
How many people have you been transparent with? Have they handled your heart well? If not, did you close up, seal the door to your heart and now have a vow of silence? No one comes in and no one goes out. All your pain is stuffed deeply inside, aching to get out. I don't want you to live that way. Life is too short to carry such a load. You have to let someone help you bear the burden you carry or soon you will be crushed by it.
I believe God gave us each other so we could help each other in this life. God knows we need help. This life is too hard and we can't do it by ourselves.
It is in relationship that we can share each other's pain and joy. HE made us to need companionship. So, if we don't have it, we suffer because we NEED to be known!
One of my most favorite books, Waking the Dead, by John Eldredge talks about our need for companions on this journey called life. It's a dreadful journey to go alone. We won't make it. We need someone to offer a hand when we fall, arms to hold us when we can't go any further, and a shoulder to cry on when our heart is breaking.
So I hope all of you reading this have someone you can pour out your heart to and if you don't, I hope you will find someone very soon. By the way, I have a very soft shoulder.........
But I believe the most important relationship we can have is with our Creator. HE made us for relationship and the primary one should be with HIM! HE truly wants us to tell HIM what is going on in our heart. So tell HIM. And if you need a relationship, start with HIM!
I'm going to tell you my Tree story next. It's all about Relationships!
Carol
To respond to this post you can email Carol at:
carolrtexas2@aol.com
Thursday, September 27, 2007
Pressure
Now I have to write something since I have made a big deal about having a blog. I can now understand how an author might feel when they have a deadline! It kind of takes the joy out of it. I guess I just need to get used to it.
I don't know why it is that some people feel compelled to write! What is that? I just have such a need to write down thoughts and feelings I have and then bore the heck out of people telling them about it! Where does that come from? Is it an ego thing?
I'll be driving somewhere and all of the sudden this idea will come to me that I think is amazing! And by the time I get home, I will have forgotten that I even had an idea, much less remember why I left in the first place! Then after I get comfortable and start watching Oprah I remember the things I went out to do. It's like my mind is so preoccupied all the time that I forget the things that I need to accomplish that day!
Lately I have been reading this book called Jerusalem Countdown. It's about the end of the world and I am so obsessed with it. This guy Hagee has some pretty radical ideas but he bases them on a lot of history and facts. If what he says is true, we have quite a future ahead of us. I would recommend you reading it (if you have the guts). And, if you are reading this, you probably need something to read and believe me, this book is compelling!
You know there is a lot of people who believe that the world is going to end in 2012. If you google it you will see all the web sites dedicated to that belief. It's a little frightening. That is the year that Luke is supposed to graduate from high school. It's a big year for us. It could be a big year for everyone........
This is the big thing on my mind lately. So that's what I'm suppose to blog about as I understand it. You just kind of put down whatever goes through your head. Well not whatever----I am not that transparent yet. But I'm a big believer in transparency. Maybe I'll blog about that next!
Until then---have a pleasant tomorrow.
Carol
To respond to this article you can email Carol at:
carolrtexas2@aol.com
I don't know why it is that some people feel compelled to write! What is that? I just have such a need to write down thoughts and feelings I have and then bore the heck out of people telling them about it! Where does that come from? Is it an ego thing?
I'll be driving somewhere and all of the sudden this idea will come to me that I think is amazing! And by the time I get home, I will have forgotten that I even had an idea, much less remember why I left in the first place! Then after I get comfortable and start watching Oprah I remember the things I went out to do. It's like my mind is so preoccupied all the time that I forget the things that I need to accomplish that day!
Lately I have been reading this book called Jerusalem Countdown. It's about the end of the world and I am so obsessed with it. This guy Hagee has some pretty radical ideas but he bases them on a lot of history and facts. If what he says is true, we have quite a future ahead of us. I would recommend you reading it (if you have the guts). And, if you are reading this, you probably need something to read and believe me, this book is compelling!
You know there is a lot of people who believe that the world is going to end in 2012. If you google it you will see all the web sites dedicated to that belief. It's a little frightening. That is the year that Luke is supposed to graduate from high school. It's a big year for us. It could be a big year for everyone........
This is the big thing on my mind lately. So that's what I'm suppose to blog about as I understand it. You just kind of put down whatever goes through your head. Well not whatever----I am not that transparent yet. But I'm a big believer in transparency. Maybe I'll blog about that next!
Until then---have a pleasant tomorrow.
Carol
To respond to this article you can email Carol at:
carolrtexas2@aol.com
Tuesday, September 25, 2007
I am New at This!
My name is Carol and I wanted to start a blog so I could have an outlet for the millions of things I think of every day. Nearly once a week I have an idea for a novel or book but that rarely amounts to anything. So I figured this might be a move in the right direction.
I'm not really in the mood to write anything right now so this is short and sweet.
I'm actually not sure why I'm doing this because I don't know that I have anything profound to say. That's why I haven't even attempted to get anything published because I think there is already too much out there now. Why would I add to the pile?????
But I'll give it a shot and see what happens. My two cents begins now!
Carol
I'm not really in the mood to write anything right now so this is short and sweet.
I'm actually not sure why I'm doing this because I don't know that I have anything profound to say. That's why I haven't even attempted to get anything published because I think there is already too much out there now. Why would I add to the pile?????
But I'll give it a shot and see what happens. My two cents begins now!
Carol
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